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My best friend came into town for thanksgiving break! (yeehaw)
& we decided to catch some drinks and visit my boyfriend at the bar he works at.
We went to my favorite lounge , Suite Lounge. Had a few martinis caught up with my cousin and her girlfriend who stopped by also and than continued on to Bottled Blonde, where Andre works at.

there is actually a funny story (?) ( kind of) , I wanted to write. More like a small conversation Stephanie & I had, that sparked this larger idea.  But got a little discouraged. So maybe I will write it out and try to articulate the way I want to write it. The title is fitting.

After some confidence boosting\ growing some guts to write it out.

This is what I wanted to say:

I don’t know if this stems from a personal insecurity or an awareness of how non Spanish people view me. But, I  base my hair style of that day depending on who I plan on hanging out with or plan on seeing.

Example: If I am familiar with a group of people, I will comfortably wear my hair naturally big and curly. However If I am going to be around people that I don’t know. ** ESP around white people** (Hate to admit it, but this is actually the case) I will make sure my hair is straight or curled with a curling iron.

I  feel this way  because  I just don’t feel like I fit in as much, with my curly hair. When I do wear my curly hair, I get treated like an exhibit. The exotic Latina with wild sex hair -____________-

This is actually something I have been called and it made me want to curl up in a ball and die of embarrassment.   I thought I was just kind of crazy for feeling this way. Even typing it out I feel a little anxiety and nervousness.

I have always felt a little self conscious about my Latina-ness. Like either I feel like I am fetishized (is that a word),  OR people make me feel like I am not Spanish enough. I don’t speak it fluently. Even though my parents do. ALSO- I have the very unfortunate

But I was really comforted when my best friend Stephanie said she was totally feeling the same way. We both came to the agreement that, had we not been together (she had her hair curly also) she would have felt weird out of place being the only curly haired girl!  Which made me feel a world of better.

This is what Stephanie wrote about the subject:

She touched on the point about curly hair not being seen as professional. A point I completely forgot to even bring up.

 But most importantly she mentioned how it’s something we (curly haired queens) need to be more accepting of how different we may look in a ocean of beautiful long straight hair and recognize  our own beauty!

Really thankful she sent me her input.

Leaving this conversation open to anyone else who wants to join in.

email me: ashleyosorio21@rocketmail.com

OR you can of course just write a comment below.