I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that saying “it’s not about you anymore” that everyone throws at mothers the moment a baby is born? Yeah, that’s bullshit.

Of course the baby is important. Of course your child becomes a priority. But this idea that your needs, your identity, your well-being just disappear into some selfless black hole the moment you become a mom? That’s not noble, it’s dangerous. It’s also the least helpful thought process when experiencing postpartum. And I reject it completely. I can say this now, but in my immediate postpartum era, it ate me tf up.

My truth is, entering motherhood is about you. It is about how you show up. How you evolve. How you hold space for yourself while caring for your children. This whole “it’s not about you anymore” thing is just a dressed-up way of telling women to put themselves last. And girllll beee frrrr putting yourself last doesn’t make you a better mother. It makes you depleted. The mom meme of the century. YOU CANT POUR FROM AN EMPTY CUP. ( you can lol but it’s not a good place to be)

I’m a mother. I’m a wife. I’m a woman who is very much here, present, and necessary. Having children didn’t erase me, it centered me. My role in this family isn’t just caretaker. I’m the heart of my home, the comfort, the energy that holds it all together. Why would I ever believe it’s not about me? I am just as important as every other member of my family.

The better I care for myself, the better I show up for them. Full stop.

So no, I’m not disappearing into the background. I’m not shrinking into motherhood. I’m expanding into it. And I refuse to let this outdated narrative convince me otherwise.